15 months old and goodbye to the baby phase

Baby Girl turned 15 months old two days ago. It’s almost impossible to get my head around the fact that it’s nearly two whole years since I found out I was pregnant with her. It feels like forever and no time at all.

It hit me with a weird sort of bump that if I was to have a two year gap between my second baby and a third sibling then I’d have to get pregnant right away. Which feels kind of horrifying at the moment, to be honest. In fact, both myself and the NLM are pretty sure we’re done with the baby phase.

It’s odd, because I’ve always considered myself to be a broody kind of person (OMGTHATBABYISSOOOCUTE etc) but when I saw a tiny newborn recently I didn’t get that familiar lurch of hormones and ache in the womb. It made me realise that I’m quite content with our brood of two girls and am really enjoying the phase they’re both at right now.

When I look back to this time last year I don’t feel an ache of nostalgia. Although the tiny baby cuddles were lovely, the waking up every half an hour certainly was not. And neither was the slow adjustment of juggling the needs of two children. At the beginning I found it easy, and then I didn’t.

I remember one particularly horrendous school run, where Frog was distraught and crying all the way to school with a tantrum of epic proportions. It was pouring with rain and I had the baby in the sling so I couldn’t physically lift Frog up or do anything really other than try to plead with her to put one foot in front of the other and walk. And all of that was dealt with on approximately an hour and a half of sleep. The memory of that morning helps to quash any sentimental feelings of broodiness over tiny fingernails and milk drunk babies.

I really love the current phase we’re in, with both girls actively playing together and getting into mischief. They wind each other up something rotten, but they’re also a little team – them against the world – which is pretty hilarious.

At 15 months old Baby Girl is as much of a bruiser as ever. She’s a tough little cookie, preferring to play rough and tumble games to sitting quietly flicking through a book. She has no fear which, as a mum who’s used to dealing with an anxious child, is quite odd. I’m used to cajoling Frog into swimming pools, for example, while her baby sister throws herself in with wild abandon (leading on more than one occasion to me diving in and scooping her out of the water).

There are pros and cons of both and I think the girls’ differing personalities really compliment each other. As they get older I can imagine Baby Girl encouraging her big sister to take more risks, and Frog encouraging Baby Girl to slow down and think about things a bit before she dives headlong into danger. Possibly.

Baby Girl isn’t saying any words yet (other than cave man speak “Og”, “Uh”, “Am” etc) but manages to make herself known without any problems. A mixture of pointing, shoving, pushing and shouting usually does the trick. The other morning the NLM turned around from putting the kettle on only to find that Baby Girl had climbed into her high chair all by herself and was waiting patiently for her breakfast. Girl loves food.

Sleep is still a sensitive subject. We’ve had nights where she’s slept soundly for 13 hours straight in her cot and others where she’s woken every hour or so. There’s always a reason – teeth, growth spurts, developmental leaps etc – but often the only thing that calms her down is a fix of boob. At 15 months she’s showing absolutely no sign of weaning off the breastfeeding and, I think, actually loves it more than ever. She’s taken to grabbing at my top when we’re out and about and she now starts clapping her hands and flapping with excitement when she realises boob is on the way. It’s how I imagine I’ll be when I get my first glass of wine at the end of Dry January.

Despite her fearless streak and her feisty independence, Baby Girl is still a real softie. She’s hugely affectionate and is generous with her cuddles and sloppy baby kisses. Although she’s walking and climbing, putting her firmly in the toddler stage, she’s still so little. Those sleepy cuddles and love of breastfeeding remind me that she’s not left the baby phase behind completely just yet.

Happy 15 months in the world, baby.