Comments on: Discipline – how do you know if you’re doing it right?

By: Grenglish (Sarah Pylas)

Grenglish (Sarah Pylas) — Wed, 31 Oct 2012 13:49:45 +0000

I have a threenager and have found that ignoring is really the only way. Take last night for example, awake at 2am and FURIOUS that I would not take him back into my own bed with me. I sat with him for a while, explained that it was nighttime and he had to sleep and that I had to sleep to but he was not listening by this stage. Cue massive meltdown in the middle of the night, screaming at the top of his lunchs which I ignored for about 10mins (but in the dark of night feels about 10 hours) until I felt he was ready to calm down. Eventually I went back in there, picked him up, popped him back into the bed, he sobbed on my shoulder a few times and then went to sleep.
Leaving the room while he is mid-tantrum does seem to do the trick for me at home, Harder when out and about though. I think you did marvellously not to lose it when she wriggled out of her car seat straps. Like most things though, as soon as you think you have found a solution, everything changes and you are back to square one again

By: Mum2BabyInsomniac

Mum2BabyInsomniac — Thu, 25 Oct 2012 20:11:37 +0000

It sounds like you did so well and I can only hope that I remain as calm as you did in the same situation. It’s so hard to know the best way to deal with situations, I have just started becoming aware of saying no to Iyla then giving in when she starts moaning. I know I should stand my ground but it’s so hard when they are shouting and crying. Toddlers are definitely send to test us! x

By: Mum of One

Mum of One — Mon, 22 Oct 2012 18:47:03 +0000

I have to say you sound like you handled in absolutely the best way possible to me. I am SOOOOO close to this happening with W and I have to say reading this post has made me feel more confident of how I will deal with it when it does happen. So upsetting for you though but stay strong. She is finding her boundaries I guess. The firmer you stay the quicker this phase will pass I expect. xxx

By: Molly

Molly — Sun, 21 Oct 2012 14:54:18 +0000

I’m not always so good at biting my lip!

By: Molly

Molly — Sun, 21 Oct 2012 14:53:42 +0000

This is true. It’s bloody hard being a parent isn’t it?!

By: Molly

Molly — Sun, 21 Oct 2012 14:53:13 +0000

It’s so hard isn’t it? I’m with you on the staying calm bit – not always easy though!

By: Molly

Molly — Sun, 21 Oct 2012 13:18:55 +0000

What a lovely comment, thank you friend. Sometimes it’s easy to get caught up in what you’ve done wrong rather than what you’ve done right. I’m a perfect example of that! xxx

By: Caroline Gue

Caroline Gue — Sat, 20 Oct 2012 18:23:16 +0000

Sounds like you dealt with it brilliantly Molly. You are such a fantastic mum – you need to know that. Because it’s times like you have described that make you wonder what it is you’ve done wrong- or at least I do in situations like that. I know it’s a bit of a cliche but it will just be a phase and the more you deal with it like you did the sooner she will realise that it doesn’t get her anywhere. You have given birth to a diva, there is no denying that, but just remember what an incredible character you have brought into the world! She is just gorgeous and makes me smile so often and I love her – even thought she is violent!!! ;). Proud of you friend xxx

By: Looking for Blue Sky

Looking for Blue Sky — Sat, 20 Oct 2012 13:56:38 +0000

That sounds like a really upsetting and hurtful experience for you It’s a long time since I had a toddler so I can only offer advice from a special needs perspective, because as you know I am still dealing with tantrums, but from an 11 year old. Being calm seems to be the key and letting them know you still love them and for a first offence I suppose I would not make the punishment too major, but when m 10 year old got violent I eventually told him that one more time and I would lock ALL his consoles in the shed. That worked, and there has been almost nothing similar since xx

By: Mari

Mari — Sat, 20 Oct 2012 12:15:38 +0000

I take my hat off to you for keeping your calm like that, I’m not sure I could have managed that situation as well as you did. I can feel your worry reading your post, where did it come from? WIll it happen again?
Let’s hope she did understand.
It’s so difficult isn’t it but I think you did marvellously