I’m experiencing some serious overcrowding problems at the moment.
We live in a two bedroom cottage, with a buggy and a million toys and baby paraphernalia stuffed into every nook and cranny. But that’s not the problem.
I feel as if my head is about to explode, as the pressure of a thousand thoughts builds to a worrying crescendo.
It’s the wedding. And work. And the baby. And those table plans. And articles. And meetings. And the radio work. And the accounts to keep on top of. And the copywriting project. And the childcare issues. And the never-ending pile of washing. And the emails – the bloody emails. They’re down to my ankles and up to my neck.
Have you ever read that fairytale about the magic porridge pot? It cooks porridge on demand and stops when you tell it to stop. Except at some point (I can’t remember the details) it fails to stop. And there’s porridge everywhere. No one can keep up – they just can’t eat it fast enough (although I doubt I’d have that problem if it was me, I’m a fast eater with a huge appetite).
That’s my life at the moment. I’m drowning in porridge.
And I hate that I’m struggling and feeling on the edge all the time. The tiniest thing can send me over; an email which will take an hour to deal with. An hour I haven’t got.
But instead of just getting on with it I’ll get all shouty and huffy and whinge on about how “I haven’t got time for this shit”. And then I’ll probably write a blog post about it. So that leaves me with minus 30 minutes to deal with a job that could have been completed an hour earlier if I’d just pulled my finger out.
God I hate porridge.
So I’m looking for your help. Apart from lists, what else helps to keep the constant flow of porridge at bay? How do you make time out of nothing? How do you solve the overcrowding issues in your head without winning the lottery and employing a million people to do everything for you?
How do you stop being a huffy old bag?
NotMissingOut said:
Post it notes.
mothersalwaysright said:
Going to buy some tomorrow.
northernmum said:
I share your pain. In fact can I just put this post on my blog as bar the wedding it sums up my life…..
mothersalwaysright said:
And I only have one. How will I ever cope with the football team I have planned?…
Sarah Mac said:
Lol, Im not sure you do. Some days you manage to eat the porridge, some you feel you’re drowning in it and others, you say sod the porridge and eat toast.
mothersalwaysright said:
I do love a good slice of toast. With marmite. Definitely sod the porridge!
Kate Takes 5 said:
You know I know how you feel. The only solutions I can offer you is (1) hire more help – cleaner (check), childminder (almost check) and (2) learn to say ‘no’. (But not when you’re at the alter. That would be bad).
mothersalwaysright said:
Ha ha, I’ll do my best. “No” isn’t really in my vocabulary at the moment. I think I need to practice saying it.
mummymummymum said:
I feel your pain too.I feel exactly the same, if you find the solution let me know. Hug xxx
mothersalwaysright said:
Apparently post-it notes help? I’m considering renting some space in someone else’s head for a while until the wedding’s over. Then I may actually remember some of the jobs I have to do!
nascentnovelist said:
Usually, when I drown in porridge (love the metaphor by the way!) I deal with it long-term by cutting some things (sadly, I have to do this every few months because I never learn my limits and always over-schedule). Luckily, this will work out for you since the wedding is a once-in-a-lifetime deal. You just have to get there!
My rescue plan for when I’m stressed out of my mind and need to get more stuff done than I have time for:
1. schedule in a meeting with yourself to get on top of things. Preferably first thing in the morning.
2. spend 30 minutes writing down every single thing you have to get done. this includes anything and everything from buying new light bulbs, to finishing your copy editing work.
3. Once you have everything you need to get done down on paper, look over the list and remove everything that isn’t pressing now. Don’t delete it or toss it, just move it into the “after-the-wedding/other-deadlines”-pile. They’re gone for now.
4. Then look over the other things and see which ones would take less than five minutes to complete. Do them now.
5. Then add up the rest of the things depending on where you’ll do them. Anything that needs to be gotten outside the house, put under errands. Everything that’s done online, put under computer. And so on. This way, you can get all the shopping done at once without forgetting to buy two things and then having to go back out.
6. Look at the things remaining on your list. How many have set dates? Program them into your calender and remember to schedule notices from your calender program so you don’t forget to show up (this happens to me a lot).
7. Rate the rest of the things on the list depending on importance and due date and do them in that order.
8. Remember that laundry, healthy eating and cleaning can all be postponed until you’re through the stressful period. Your life is better when you do them, but it’s not crucial.
9. Remember to take a little time off every day to recharge your batteries. If you’re stressed out all the time, you won’t be as efficient. I know this point is hard when your mind is reeling with all the stuff you should be doing. I usually work out, because there’s no room in my head for anything other than the exercise while I’m doing it. Sex is also good for this.
Good luck! You’ll get through this. Just keep swimming through that porridge!
mothersalwaysright said:
This is probably the most helpful blog comment I’ve ever had – it’s reminded me exactly why I love blogging! Thank you so much. I have a new plan now to get up 30 minutes earlier than planned and sort my list out. This should help!
mum2babyinsomniac said:
I have porridge bubbling out the top of my roof and all my windows, and I don’t even have an excuse! I’m not getting married and I’m not working. I am just rubbish. I do like porridge though, especially the winter pudding oats so simple, good job I like it I suppose! x
nascentnovelist said:
Awesome. Let me know how it works out for you!
mothersalwaysright said:
Glad to know I’m not alone – although I wish I loved porridge as much as you. Maybe then I’d be better at keeping up with it.
Boatwife said:
I have this problem too! Thanks so much to nascentnovelist for the answers!
nascentnovelist said:
Any time! Good to know that years and years of self-induced stress is good for something.
mothersalwaysright said:
Couldn’t agree more.
granny from the north said:
first I read your post as “every nook and granny”! yes we do get everywhere…and we are here to help so just ask! I can organise everyone else no problem it’s just myself not too good at, so if I follow my own advice…I think you have all the skills you need, the answer is to carry on as you are! You are doing a great job. XXX
granny from the north said:
Oh and I do recomend lists – getting it all out on paper with accompanying doodles does really help to clear the mind, also going for a jog is goodXX
mothersalwaysright said:
Can’t say I agree with the jogging – but the lists are a definite winner! x
granny from the north said:
that’s recommend!
caroline said:
I was going to say lists too! I add ings like ‘clean teeth, have a cup of tea…’ just so I can feel good about getting a few things crossed off! It does wonders for feeling a bit like you’re getting somewhere! I have some of those ‘as featured on Dragon’s Den’ whiteboard sheets that stick to anything- come and get one (or two, or three…)
Xxx
mothersalwaysright said:
Yes please!
Anna said:
Wow @Nascentnovelist’s answer is amazingly helpful. I’ll be using some of that.
Also, no real helpful advice sorry, but I think you sound perfectly normal for a working mum about to get married. If you weren’t a little cluttered with thoughts and to-do-lists, you may be missing something vitally important!x
mothersalwaysright said:
Very true. I’m going to remember this next time I start feeling like my head’s going to explode. Thank you. x