Celebrating the ordinary: managing to persuade a toddler to have an afternoon nap = win.
Last week I wrote a post admitting I often struggle with feeling “not good enough“. It was one of those posts that sees you hesitate before hitting publish. I worried that I’d been too vulnerable, admitted too much, been a bit needy. No one likes needy.
But I’m glad I wrote that post. The huge range of comments it provoked, both on the blog, Twitter, Facebook and Google+, all made me realise it’s not just me. It would seem every single one of us has the odd nagging doubt from time to time.
I admitted I sometimes didn’t feel like I was doing “enough” in my working life (despite often working around 70 hours a week). I held my hands up to the fact I very rarely felt like I was doing “enough” in my role as a mum and wife. I openly shouted that I’m RUBBISH at keeping on top of the housework and the washing.
But then a funny thing happened. I had comments from other mums with sparkly careers in the media and finance. I had comments from other mums who spend all day making homemade playdough and sensory tubs. I had comments from mums with immaculate homes.
I had comments from university students worried about getting top grades, comments from dads struggling with juggling work and fatherhood and comments from grandparents who feel they should do more.
And the common theme amongst every single comment? NO ONE felt like they were continually being good enough. Whatever that may be.
And it got me thinking, maybe we need to start shouting more about the ordinary stuff. I’m not talking about the parenting wins or the amazing career breaks or the huge big life announcements on Facebook. I’m talking about the little things – making tea without burning the saucepan. Getting the kids to bed without a tantrum. Going a full two days in a row without a celebratory glass of wine in the evening.
THESE are the things we need to make more of. Then maybe we’d all realise we’re pretty much the same. Whatever your family finances, the size of your house, the success of your career, the skill of your baking or playdough making – no one is perfect all the time. And you know what? That’s OK actually.
So, here’s your chance to celebrate the ordinary. What normal, mundane stuff has gone right for you today?
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I actually had my photocopying done before the yr12’s arrived for their lesson!
ALL of it? Seriously? That’s impressive – I don’t think I’d ever be that prepared if I was a teacher!
Molly. This is the second time today that something you’ve written has made me feel a bit emotional. Stop it!!
You’re so right. I have so far eaten no chocolate today. YAY ME!
Sorry! And YAY for the no chocolate – that is a major achievement on a Monday. x
Smallest Daughter (on getting to the otherside of the road): Mummy!! I didn’t even get SQUISHED!!
Counts as a victory in our House……
I was on time for work. Trust me – after the morning I had it was an achievement!
It’s always an achievement getting in on time! x
My daughter has celebrated her second birthday today. She had a few presents, two friends round, and a pizza for dinner. An ordinary birthday, but a perfect one in her little world. My aim, every day, is not to try to be a perfect mummy, but a good enough mummy. I think it’s a sound mantra to live by.
And what a sensible mantra it is. Happy birthday to your gorgeous little girl. x
I’m reading this at 9am, so it’s a bit early, buuut I made my son laugh this morning instead of just trying not to shout at him to get him out the door to school on time. Win
That deserves a round of applause. Nothing like starting the day on a win! x
I’m grateful that I’ve done the washing up and that my kids have spoken to their grandparents via Skype (they live in Australia).
Skype is the BEST. And hurrah for the washing up. Mine’s still sitting in the sink. Sigh.
This morning the little man threw my boots across the room. I asked him to bring them back. He did. x
Please tell me your secret! x
I did the washing up and hoovered the house before I left for work! I can’t even remember the last time I did housework so this was a pretty massive achievement! x
That is a HUGE achievement. How anyone manages to get housework done and get to work and get kids out the door to nursery / school etc is beyond me! x
I have taken my children to school three days in a row without any shouting. Thanks for the reminder, it’s important to focus on the dids not the did nots.