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anniversary, Cheltenham, children, husband and wife, married life, Parenting, relationships, toddlers
I’ve just spent a weekend without my baby. And it was bliss.
Hear me out.
I love my daughter with every fibre of my being. I haul myself out of bed to work very odd hours every day, all for her. I do it so she will have a room of her own one day in our own house, with holidays and swimming lessons and all the other lovely things small people like.
But sometimes I need some time with her dad – my husband – without the label of “mum”. Sometimes I just need to be me, with him, on our own.
Those times happen very rarely. The last time we ventured away from the house, just the two of us, was back in February when we went on our honeymoon. And what with our long working patterns, busy family life and the hectic summer schedule of visits and catching up with relatives, the next installment of “us” time was very much appreciated.
This last weekend we celebrated our first year wedding anniversary. It was a couple of weeks late, so we threw both our birthdays into the mix too and really pushed the boat out.
We stayed here:
In this room:
(Yes, that’s a bath in the corner of the room.)
We ate breakfast in bed, drank cocktails, ate far too much cheese and mooched around Cheltenham.
If you’re after a weekend of relaxation, I really can’t recommend The Montpellier Chapter enough. It’s not cheap, but the hotel is beautifully restored with art and stunning architecture. The service is impeccable (the staff uniform comprises Converse trainers – what more can you want?) and the technology at the hotel is second to none.
I didn’t realise just how much I needed a weekend away with the (self-proclaimed) Northern Love Machine until we were in the car on the way there and it dawned on me that I wasn’t even stressed at the traffic.
It’s hard to get worked up when you can see this out of your window:
A walk in the park on a hot afternoon, followed by a leisurely read of the papers in bed, followed by more food and fizz… I’m a restored woman.
So yes, we spent the weekend away from our beautiful baby. But we came back happier and more relaxed parents because of it.
How about you – have you ever had a mini-break without the kids?
Ooh, if you didn’t deserve it so much I’d be very envious! Looks absolutely beautiful, and sounds like you had a wonderful time. Were you tempted to just spend the whole weekend in that bath?!
It has been a looong time since we’ve had proper time to ourselves – part of the problem since we moved house has been finding babysitters, so we don’t even get the nights out that we used to have, let alone the minibreaks. But I think if you’ve got friends or family you’re happy to leave your children with then you definitely should, without feeling guilty. As you say, getting that bit of space probably makes you come back a better parent.
xx
I know exactly what you mean, both sets of parents live 3 miles away, which is probably why we don’t get out as much as we should! x
We went away for a wedding on Saturday night and it was lovely! Being able to get a train without a buggy , go for a swim, stay out late. . . I think we all need time to be a couple as well as a family x
Couldn’t agree more. I think it’s really important, if you can get the time and want it. Your weekend sounds lovely.
That room looks amazing!! I think it’s important to have just me and you (as in you and OH) time and there’s nothing wrong with it. Somewhere and some time to just reconnect and “be”
Thought you were propositioning me then! Know exactly what you mean though, just to “be” without being “mum” or “dad” is really lovely sometimes.
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Oooh, that looks beautiful. It’s so lovely to get some time alone, especially when they’re little and their demands are often overwhelming. Good on you for taking that time out.
CJ x
I must admit, I did feel quilty about it. The Mother Guilt always comes in somewhere doesn’t it?! But after getting a text from my mum to say F hadn’t asked after me once and was having a whale of a time, I soon started to relax!
that looks lovely..lucky you!
Not having babysitters we tend to go out on our own rather than as a couple…& I have been known to squeeze the odd girls weekend in from time to time x
It really, really was lovely. And I know how you feel. Both our parents live 3 hours away so time away together is very rare!
We just had two nights away when we were visiting the grandparents in Italy to Tuscany (a shameless plug but you can read about it herehttp://brinabird.blogspot.co.uk/2012/09/a-little-bit-of-tuscany.html) . It was really a fantastic time and as much as I missed my wee man I was relaxed and happy to be away. It took a while to build up the confidence to do it mind you but I personally would recommend it to all parents if they can get the chance. My wee man had a blast of a time being without us as well as he was spoiled rotten by his grandparents! I don’t even think he really looked for us :0
Wow looks absolutely beautiful and blissful-happy birthday and anniversary x
We decided not go away on holiday this summer but have lots of family days out, and dotted in between, the little man’s daddy and I have had a couple of outings out together and, as a real treat, we booked in for a weekend away at a posh spa hotel. It was only for one night but we felt like we had been away for a week. We spent both days sprawling by the pool, going in the hottub, having massages (him) and pedicures (me), then out for a meal in the evening where we managed to squeeze in three courses when two were quite enough. It was wonderful – like it was before we became parents but with the added bonus of knowing we had a little person who would be very pleased to see us when we returned.
Love where you stayed. Might have to check it out ourselves.
Sounds like you had the perfect summer x
Glad to see The Guardian was part of your idyll!
But of course!
I can’t believe a year’s already been since your wedding! Looks like a great weekend. No way am I ready for a weekend without Talitha though. I know my husband wishes I were!
Know what you mean, always lovely to come home after any time away from F. x
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We have never been away without Baba, but he goes off to his Nannies and aunties a lot and it is so lovely. A) for him as he gets to spend quality time with them all and B) for us as we do get to lay in have breakfast in bed and chill out. It is needed by all really, I totally agree that is good for your soul and you do get refreshed. xx
Any time alone is always such a treat when it’s so rare. And always so lovely to get time together again when you’re all back as a family. x
I LIVE for the nights away without our child. I love him to bits and always have done, but those nights remind me that I have a personality and a life beyond ‘mummy’.
Amen to that. It’s so refreshing to ditch the “Mummy” label for a short time and indulge in too much wine, without the fear of being woken at 5am the next day. They’re rare, but when these times away do happen I grab onto them with both hands.
HURRAH to knowing that I am not an Evil, heartless Mummy and that OTHER PEOPLE get excited about going away WITHOUT their children!!!
I love my Girls to Death, I honestly do, but I get to a point where I want a day without dealing with someone elses Poo, to not have put my Referees hat on or to have to put my pants on OUTSIDE my tights and attempt to be Superwoman, thus allowing me to be in more than one place at a time etc!!!
It is now only 15 sleeps until Mr W & I go to Vancouver for our 10th Wedding Anniversary and I am besides myself with excitement……..oddly, about being able to sit and watch a film (or 2) on the plane, whilst enjoying a glass of something “Fizzy” that isn’t Brown and comes in cans, without having to check who is doing what to whom etc!!!
Time away reminds you who you are, to yourself as well as to each other, and allows you to be a better Parent – I think it should be made compulsory for Parents everywhere!!!
I don’t blame you for being excited – that will be an AMAZING holiday!
I love to get away without the children and make no apologies for it. We try to do this at least twice a year and always have agreat time. No guilts for me, I know we both need it.
I’d love to make it a regular thing too. Did us both so much good.
Just came over from the Tots100. That hotel looks heavenly. I’ll have to make a note of the name as it looks just up my street!