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Mother's Always Right

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Dear Effie, on your 3rd birthday

October 6, 2017 by Molly 2 Comments

Hello and welcome! I'm Molly Forbes - podcaster, presenter and blogger with a passion for positivity, confidence and body image chat. Regularly writing and vlogging about empowering female issues from a motherhood angle, I also cover lifestyle and fashion topics for like-minded mums who want to rediscover themselves after having children. Thanks for stopping by! Read More…

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Art by @ebrulillustrates for @ourstreetsnow (share

Art by @ebrulillustrates for @ourstreetsnow (shared with permission)
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I shouted so loudly at the radio in the car last night that my kids, sitting in the back, looked up in shock. “WE DON’T NEED ALARMS WE NEED MEN TO STOP ATTACKING US.” This bubbling of rage has clearly been lying dormant until a badly worded news report poked it back into being.
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You might be wondering why I’m posting about this when the majority of my content is around body image, mental health and parenting. The murder of Sabina Nessa and the wider issue of violence against women and marginalised genders intersects with all of the above.
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Girls learn from an early age their bodies are not their own. I’m seeing it already with the things my 11yo daughter is hearing on the school bus or the comments in her WhatsApp groups.
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From school uniform policies to social media and comments in the corridors, girls are taught to police their bodies, that the onus is on them to “stay safe” or “be good” or have the “right” body.
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Later, this translates to how they carry themselves in the street, how they move from one place to the next.
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The problem is not girls’ bodies, the problem is the way girls’ bodies are treated.
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As @ourstreetsnow so eloquently put it: “The continual violence faced by women, girls and marginalised genders, particularly when victims are Black and another minoritised ethnicity, is an outrage to our society. The death of Sabina Nessa, like those of Sarah Everard, Bibaa Henry and Nicole Smallman, is part of a wider pattern of systematic male violence. We need structural change to overcome this, all the way from our education system to our courts.”
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[Image description: An illustration of a memorial for Sabina Nessa with text which reads “Demand change now” “Rest in peace Sabina” “We don’t feel safe” “Stop telling us we’re overreacting”.]

I used to think movement meant punishment. Now I t

I used to think movement meant punishment. Now I think it’s self-care. I used to think rest meant giving up. Now I think it’s self-care. I used to think self-care meant bubble baths and face masks. Now I think it’s boundaries and saying no and sleep and swimming (when I feel like it) and boring stuff like changing my sheets regularly and outsourcing jobs when needed.
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Nothing is straight forward and the way we frame things is everything.
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Some early morning thoughts from me as I pootled through the water this morning.
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How has the way you view movement and rest and self-care changed over the years? Let’s chat in the comments ❤️👇
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[Image description: A selfie of Molly smiling at the camera with her thumb up. She’s by a swimming pool and wearing goggles and an orange and pink floral swimsuit.]

A bloody lovely DM . . . . . . . [Image d

A bloody lovely DM 🥰💕
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[Image description: A screenshot of a DM which reads: “Hi Molly! So I know you probably get lots of messages every day and I hope you see this and it makes you smile. But I first found you on Naked Beach and I thought you were just so lovely and quickly followed you on Insta! But your energy, positivity and desire to support others gave me an idea. At work me along with two other colleagues set up ‘Positividay!’ We try to do it often but particularly when we feel the teams mental health is in a bit of a lul. But we ask who would like to join in and then everyone will chose a name out of a hat. We will then write something we appreciate or like about that person to just give them a little lift! It just brings a little excitement and joy to everyone and it’s received lots of positive comments about it too! I just wanted to thank you for being the inspiration behind a little project that’s become a weekly practice for us 😊️. I have included some of my notes too, just because. I hope you have a lovely day! X” Next to the text is a photo of the notes referenced in the text.]

Petition to make Breakfast Starters a thing (and t

Petition to make Breakfast Starters a thing (and to rename all starters as the “Get Me Going” course) please and thank you.
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[Image description: a tweet which reads “My 6yo has requested a slice of sour dough toast to “get her going” before the main brunch event of pancakes this morning, and honestly this is the kind of energy around food I can relate to. Now, every time I eat out and have a starter it’s “to get me going”.]

My book turned five months old this month. I often

My book turned five months old this month. I often hear writers say things like “If my book helps just one person then it’ll be worth it” but, for me, I’m afraid that’s not the case. You see, I don’t want one person to be helped by it - I want lots of people to be helped by it. And, for that to happen, I need lots of people to read it.
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I’m not a celeb or someone who has gazillions of followers on social media, and my book was published in a pandemic which made traditional ways to market it even trickier - no glossy launch party here!
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So, the thing that makes all the difference with this book is word of mouth recommendations, which has certainly been the case so far. It was amazing to see people giving it as teacher presents at the end of the summer term. For others, this might mean telling a friend about it, requesting your local library stocks it, ordering a copy as a present for a pal, a grandparent, or your kid’s teacher, or sharing this very post.
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And, if you want to go a step further, leaving a review on Amazon. Whatever you think of Jeff Bezos et al, Amazon remains the biggest source of book sales and the algorithm is more likely to recommend Body Happy Kids to new readers the more reviews it has. You don’t have to have bought the book on Amazon to rate it there, and it takes just a second to do.
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This book is for any adult who’s ever around children. I wrote it with the hope of creating a ripple of change to help reverse the culture of body shame more and more kids and teens are growing up with. The more people who read it, the more chance we have of changing the current narrative ✨ #BodyHappyKids
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[Image description: Molly stands in her kitchen holding a copy of her book, Body Happy Kids. She is wearing a lilac animal print dress with black cardigan and glasses, and is smiling at the camera.]

Final flings of summer Some snapshots of su

Final flings of summer ☀️ Some snapshots of sunny times from the past week. School starts here tomorrow and I’m in total denial I will have a child at big school starting Year 7. Hold me 😭
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Caveating this post with a disclaimer that of course along with these lovely happy times we’ve had cross words over messy bedrooms and screen time, along with the usual parental guilt and stress of the work juggle (they were on tablets for 6 hours straight yesterday while I was at my laptop 😬😬😬). Don’t fall into the trap of thinking every moment shared on social media is a full reflection of every facet of someone’s life - including mine.
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But I’ve also come to realise something this summer and it’s something I’m challenging myself to confront: we don’t need to justify happy times with a reminder of bad ones to balance things out. We’re deserving of joy, just because. We don’t need to earn it, or feel guilty for experiencing it - whether it’s a delicious mid-afternoon nap, hot cup of tea or holiday.
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It’s capitalism and hustle culture that makes us think we need to put a disclaimer on every happy moment to “earn” it. A culture that glorifies burnout and normalises overwork and unhealthy boundaries.
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When you work in the field of work that I do this can be even more the case. I sometimes feel guilty for experiencing joy because I’m so deeply aware of how tough things are for so many, and how much work there is to be done to make positive change happen.
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But this is lifelong work, and without wishing to sound like a Homesense Live Laugh Love poster we are ALL allowed to have joy and laughter in our lives, just because. Including me. I hope you’ve had some joy lately too.
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