There was a story in the news today. It’s not a particularly “new” issue and certainly isn’t one I’ve never come across before. But it helped me realise something.
I am not a CWP.
The story I’m talking about comes from the National Trust. They reckon more parents need to make the most of the great outdoors and let their kids do traditional activities like climbing up trees and rolling down hills. They’re also well up for a bit of conker action and burying people in the sand.
This is all pretty tame stuff, or so I thought. I just assumed letting your kids do stuff like that was part of being a parent. All kids climb trees don’t they? Isn’t it just something kids like to do? And rolling down hills – when did that become a revolutionary activity?
It would seem I’ve had my head buried in a (non child made) hole of sand though.
It turns out there are two camps in the parenting club: the Cotton Wool Camp and the Non-Cotton Wool Camp. Or, Cotton Wool Parents and Non-Cotton Wool Parents.
I’m not saying it’s best to be one or the other. I’m just saying that I’m not a CWP. This probably has something to do with the fact that when I was growing up, all of the above activities were par for the course. Sometimes we hurt ourselves (my sister broke her arm). Sometimes we stepped in dog poo (or tried to eat it, in the case of my sister). Sometimes we even nearly drowned (me).
But all of these experiences were ones that were mixed with doing really fun stuff, like swimming in the sea, climbing on old logs, rolling down sand dunes. They were, for me, an essential part of my childhood.
So tell me, when did they become revolutionary?
Frog making a mess on a too-high chair.
Is that a Jam roly poly that Frog is making there?!
My kids aren’t natural tree climbers & I don’t think Sam will be trying it again any time soon after he slipped & landed astride a large branch…ouch! They’re quite happy to roll down hills & bury each other in the sand though!
x
It’s pizza dough. Although jam roly poly is on the cards for the weekend! x
Loving the new blog look!
I heard this report and it had me going grrrr…. I am so sick of endless ‘children don’t do enough of this any more’ reports out all the time. It really annoys me because it’s just a bit of parent bashing, how we’re all denying our children by being too precious with them. I don’t think it’s true and I don’t know any other parents who are CWP. We had a lovely day out at Wellington Country Park today, it was busy and all the children there were crashing around having fun and falling off things. My little girl fell off something and got a nosebleed, it sounds bad but never mind she was having fun and only cried for 2 minutes. It’s all part of play and to be honest I think most families are the same. That pic of F is hilarious : )
It’s interesting really isn’t it, because I’d never come across the notion in REAL LIFE that parents didn’t let their kids do these things. Not saying either way is right or wrong, just that maybe I’d been naive. Maybe I wasn’t being naive though. Maybe the idea of CWP’s is really a fantasy, made up to push a PR campaign?
I thought the 50 ideas were quite nice really. Perhaps we underestimate how many kids are sat indoors playing video games all day.
A few years ago I helped take a group of inner city London children to an outward bound centre. Many of them had never been out of London, and couldn’t believe how many trees there were once we got outside the M25. I was pretty shocked and surprised. I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t have done most of the activities on that list.
Anything that encourages parents to get out with their kids is good in my book.
Sorry to be controversial
It’s not controversial – debate is good. And I agree that anything to get kids outside is a good thing. I was probably being naive and in a bubble thinking that these were things most kids did anyway – city or otherwise! Afterall, I grew up in the middle of Bristol, a pretty big city! x
I just thought Z would love to have a list of things he could do and tick off, and some of them I have never done like ‘dam a stream’ or ‘light a fire without matches’.
Z does like lists though
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I know what you mean – my issue wasn’t so much with the list itself, it was more a question of if these were such radical ideas and if some parents REALLY didn’t let their kids do these things, because of wanting to protect them, rather than not having the opportunity to do them. x
I actually find this quite sad. My kids are the ones in the park, running riot, building camps, having a bit of freedom to explore, go on rope swings – I set the boundaries, so long as they don’t leave the play area and come and “check in” with me every 5 mins, I love the fact they have freedom to assess and take risks. The only thing I draw the line at, is playing out on their own/going to the park (but that is because we live in London on a busy road). My 8 year old goes up to the shop on his own which my other neighbour is shocked at. She has a 10 year old who is always by her side, he is totally naive and in the park, scared to even try the rope swing “in case he falls off” (his words). I find that sad.
None of my kids have DSs, ipods, facebook accounts – a lot of their friends do but for me, I would rather they were rolling down hills or building a camp in the garden using their imagination……..
Can’t find the 50 things list, would be interested to see that…
I’ve waffled
I haven’t seen the article mentioned here but I do know some CWP’s…one being my best friend. Her little girl isn’t allowed to leave the room without her following her to ‘make sure’ she’s ok, so eating slugs, falling into the goat pen at the local farm or being accosted by a lemur (all things my daughter has done…am I an errant parent!?!) are things I could never imagine her doing! I too find that sad.
I think in the world we live in now it’s easy to imagine that all kids spend their time stuck indoors on their DS’s etc, I’ve seen my fair share of four year olds sat in pushchairs at the zoo with their faces stuck in handhelds or with headphones in but I do think perhaps it’s an exaggerated concept.
Childhood SHOULD be about running round, getting mucky and getting into scrapes…it’s the only chance you really get to do it!
Can I tell you a secret? I still do it now sometimes. Nothing like getting a bit muddy and jumping in puddles occasionally. Great comment, thank you for stopping by.
I let my then 4-year-old daughter play the Runaway Train round the rim of of a lily pond. She fell in and sank from view. I had to wade in chest deep to save her and, in the winter frost, we both nearly collapsed from hypothermia. A mother who’d watched from the sidelines used us as an example to her son of how not to behave. I felt mortified by my failings. But, my daughter learned from the experience and now exercises sensible caution near water where I still let her play and I’ve realised that so long as I’m within sight or earshot of an SOS it’s far better to let them climb high up a tree and jump far over a ditch and learn for themselves about risk and capability. Protected children will ultimately be ill-equipped to survive real life.
This is exactly my view. There are so many potential dangers out there, if we thought about them all our kids would never leave the house. I’d just be a quivering wreck, sitting in the corner not letting F leave the living room!
Having just watched The Hunger Games I’ll only say this: if that girl’s parents hadn’t let her climb trees, she would not have survived.
Ooh I really want to see The Hunger Games. Any good?
See, this report annoyed me for two reasons. Firstly, the majority of activities on the list are the kind of spontaneous things that kids just do anyway if they have the opportunity, and I don’t think we should be turning them into planned, premeditated activities, i.e. ‘Look, darling, it’s raining, quickly go outside and have a dance…’ TICK. And secondly, it’s just another thing to be competitive about. I’ve already seen parents on forums bragging about how their three-year-old has done 49 out of 50 already, blah blah blah, and it’s a bit tedious!
Oh I’m glad I haven’t seen those comments on forums. It would irritate me too!
I’m with Emma, unfortunately I think there are an awful lot of children who don’t do this stuff and sadly, we end up with a flippin list reminding parents what to do…. I watched the Band Master bloke Gareth in a programme where he took a group of primary aged boys to improve their literacy. It was horrifying how many spent hours and hours on computer games and how many had never been in a book shop.
It’s a shame, I agree. I guess I must be naive to think that most kids do this stuff regardless.
Still searching for a tree for little madam to climb that doesn’t have a bog beneath it. In my head we had bought a house with a woodland like you find in National Trust properties, clearly not! Extra brownie points for son-in-law fort website and new address postcards. Love ma x
She’ll love it – we’ll make sure we bring her wellies!
Sometimes I am a CWP…depends what extended family are up to! Sometimes you need soft landing!
Great post! Since when did we need a list for parenting? I appreciate maybe some people do, but I personally would rather not be categorised. and instructed. I like Lucy’s comment about the tick list too! Sometimes when it is raining me and the toddler curl up and watch movies and eat popcorn, other times we get dressed up and jump in muddy puddles. I prefer the spontaneous as opposed to checking my list each day to be sure I am parenting the “right” way. x
I’m like you in that I prefer to be spontaneous. This probably has more to do with the fact I’m not very organised and have a terrible memory though. So if I had a list it would just gather dust on the noticeboard and not get looked at – like lots of other things!